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Women of Impact

Jun 24, 2020

Best known as the “Millennial Therapist”, Sara Kuburic has built quite an online following by posting hard truths in ways that allow people to actually accept and learn from them. Needless to say, that balancing act requires an unusual combination of a strong moral center, a non-judgmental attitude, and a whole lot of empathy. Thankfully, she brings all of those qualities to this episode of Women of Impact with Lisa Bilyeu. Lisa and Sara discuss self-sabotage, self-awareness and personal growth. They talk about how to give and receive hard truths, why toxic positivity is so insidiously harmful, and the reasons why we judge ourselves and others.

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Why do we self-sabotage, and what constitutes self-sabotage? [2:03]

How to deal with the desire for instant gratification [4:10]

When we reenact patterns we feel in control, but that can be dangerous [6:16]

Sara hopes to spark interest in improvement with her social media posts [8:22]

Hard truths don’t have to be harsh truths, but a lot of suffering comes from avoiding truth [10:48]

If you find yourself resisting a hard truth, ask what you need to be open to that truth [11:57]

When is it our place to tell someone a hard truth, and when is it not? [14:00]

Sara explains why we avoid believing people when they tell us who they are [16:14]

Sara and Lisa discuss why you should put your true self forward even on a first date [18:45]

Sara talks about why you might seek relationships with emotionally unavailable people [21:08]

Sara and Lisa discuss why taking responsibility hurts your ego at first [23:01]

Blame and self-judgment are never the point of self-awareness [25:03]

Most of the time when we judge others it’s because we are triggered [26:36]

Judgment also comes from a lack of understanding or real moral conflicts [29:25]

Sara describes what moral injury is, and how it relates to infidelity [31:36]

Lisa and Sara discuss how deeply personal morality is [33:59]

Lisa asks why people invalidate themselves so much, and Sara discusses toxic positivity [35:58]

Sometimes we try to make people feel better but it’s actually for us [40:06]

Instead of telling people to calm down, try to understand them [42:10]

Lisa and Sara discuss asking permission to give someone advice or truth [45:06]

Sara says her superpower is adaptability [46:39]